Is it really just skin care?

A lot of us, myself included, have had a slew of products hanging out in our bathrooms.  All of the promising concoctions that we are told will basically move mountains for our skin.  Some of them feel nice.  Some of them have burned.  Some of them smelled weird.  Regardless of how these products have affected us, we have bought them because we were told they are going to do something for us that we want and need.  

In my previous newsletter, I spoke about seeing the skin care industry in a new way, and now I'm revealing to you what I have been understanding.   But first, I want to make a disclaimer:  everyone is unique, has different experiences with their skin, has different experiences with consumerism, and we all have different journeys.  

I am not trying to endorse that everyone should become “granola” and not enjoy any skin care.  But I do want people to be educated, informed, and empowered to “know thyself”, because that will inform the decisions we make about the care for our skin and bodies.  

One of my favorite journalist that I could quote all day, says we should change the name of the “beauty industry” to the “appearance industry”, meaning the two are not the same because beauty is multi-dimensional, has different layers to it;  whereas the appearance industry tends to be one-dimensional and is about fitting into a box.  There are industries out there who set beauty standards, and these standards are marketed to the masses to sell products.   Skin care has always been around.  We can look through history and see that concoctions and rituals were used for treating and beautifying the skin all the way back to Cleopatra.  Most of them were natural remedies and they were about enhancing ones' beauty and taking pleasure in the ritual.   Even when skin care started to become manufactured, formulas were still respecting the functions of the skin.  It was about gentle cleansing, trying not to disturb the skin, and adding moisture.  It was about supporting the health of the skin.  

What has vastly changed in the last 20 years, and even more so in the past 10 years, with everyone participating on social media, and having more pictures and videos taken of us, the skin has become the target of being seen as if we are looking at it under a magnifier.  And not just of ourselves, we have been conditioned to think/feel that everyone is looking at our skin as if under a magnifier.   Natural components of the skin such as having pores/visible pores, acne, inflammation, textures, dry patches, lines, wrinkles, spots were now being marketed as “flaws” that need to be erased or managed, and now here comes ALLLL of the skin products and procedures that will take care of these “problems”.       And for people who are actually dealing with skin issues such as acne, or their skin was showing signs of stress, the anxiety ramped up because it can feel like what could have been masked or concealed is now visible to everyone. 

Things that are naturally occurring with the skin have now taken on a value of what it says about “us”.

So my new client came in a few weeks back, and my first thought when standing a few feet apart is that she has beautiful skin.  When I asked what concerns or questions she had, she mentioned she has had a problem with her pores being big and congested, and that her former esthetician was doing treatments that got rid of the pores and congestion, but that there was still texture and she was afraid the visibility of her pores was coming back.   Years ago, I would have gotten excited because I had been taught that we would just do a chemical peel or some type of abrasion to whittle down the tops layers of the skin, making the pores appear smaller, melting the contents, and get on an acid serum to use at home.  Boom.  Problem solved.  I had no idea what the skin barrier was, the acid mantle, the microbiome, amongst other things that are not taught in esthetics school. 

But now, I started to ask her questions and I'm sure she felt like she was at a therapist office. haha.   I wanted to know what it was about having visible pores that bothered her.  Pores are a normal part of the skin as they secrete moisture, we perspire and detox through the pores, and they also play a role in our body temperature regulation.  They are meant to be there.   I knew the answer, but I wanted her to dig in a little and bring up where this message had come from.  That pores are ugly, that it's a sign of not having “good, pretty skin”.  She did acknowledge this, and I could tell there was some anxiety attached to it (understandably).  

So I assess her skin and the whole area that she felt concerned about was dry and textured, unlike the rest of the skin on her face.  The area felt like a scab.  And she may have had some congestion there at one point, but now her skin was so over exfoliated, it was currently in crisis/protection mode.  And she thought that her continued use of an acid serum at home would eventually get rid of the texture.  I explained about the skin barrier and made my suggestion to stop the acid serum, stop exfoliating the area, and let her barrier build back up.  I asked her to trust her skin.  Trust that it can balance itself out and actually have the healthy aesthetic she desires.  And I'm aware I was giving a tall order, considering this went completely against what skin culture advises, and what I used to advise.  Hearing that doing less or implementing modalities like lymphatic drainage is not the mainstream message.  

Do you see where I'm going with this?    

Marketing, and skin practitioners, like myself, sold her the idea that something was wrong with the appearance of pores.   Aggressive treatment and product then alleviated the look of the pores, brought relief to her that she was able to achieve pore-less looking skin, and now her skin was in damage control.  Over time, strong exfoliation will wipe out the precious barrier of our skin that is there to keep balance, and it also wipes out the microbiome (I will explain these more later), which actually weakens and depletes the skin.  This will lead to a loss of elasticity (amongst many other issues), which can make pores look bigger, and then the vicious cycle continues of trying to alleviate what was not a problem in the first place.  It keeps people dependent on more products and even dependent on practitioners, and it will keep you on a wheel until you decide to exit, if ever.    

The skin care industry is not just about about our skin.  It is about our precious psyche, our innate human desire for beauty and health, and our need to be connected with others and not wanting to be cast out from the tribe.  The skin care industry has tapped into some of the most vulnerable parts of our humanity, and has made a multi-billion dollar industry by convincing us that something is wrong with us. You won't be cast away from the tribe if your skin has bumps, lines, wrinkles, etc. but the part of your brain that perceives that danger is triggered.   Nothing is working with you.  Nothing is wrong with your skin.   It is an intelligently designed, self-regulating organ that you don't have to do anything to make it work, the same way you don't have to make your other organs work (unless dis-ease becomes present, then support is absolutely beneficial).   And when a standard has been set in place, which is basically our skin should look like a baby's skin forever, then we become a lifelong consumer of these products and procedures, because you will never reach the goal and then you're done.  

With all of that said, I truly love caring for the skin.  I think it's wonderful that people want to look and feel their best.  I still love and appreciate products and massage that support and promotes our skin's vibrancy.   My skin care routine looks different than it did years ago, and I can vouch that going from using more products to less and adding other techniques actually made my skin look and feel better.  More importantly, the way I feel about myself is more solid.  It has all been about finding “the middle way”:  enjoying caring for the skin from a place of love, and not from a place of fear.  Learning that we don't have to be aggressive or manipulate the skin to achieve goals (there are other ways). Having discernment of when the skin needs more guidance and support.    

I do not judge anyone for wanting to use products that manipulate the appearance of their skin.  I just know now that it's not just about the skin.   

I will continue sharing about how the skin is a door to the inner world that is you,  AND, I will share tips on taking care of our skin and enhancing the aesthetic. 

 Love,

Alaina